Episode 11: Portal Into Time. Thundarr, Ariel and Ookla are enjoying a nice wizard-free campfire when they are attacked by toad Vikings in laser mounted tanks who are making for the nearby mountains where there lies a human fort, the Alamo. Drones emerge from the Alamo to fend off the attackers but the drones ultimately fail, forcing the heroes to join in the Alamo’s defense. The heroes destroy the toad Vikings tanks and drive them away, Ariel issuing a pithy “remember the Alamo” with her magic, and cowboys emerge from the fort to thank them for their help. The cowboy leader, Cardath, explains that their “guardian”, a giant computer of some sort that controls the drones, was stolen from a wizard named Crom (a name shamelessly lifted from Conan mythos) and has never failed them before this attack. Ariel determines that the computer failed due to a burnt out circuit and that they’d have to travel back in time 2000 years to replace it. Thankfully evil wizard Crom has a “moon dial” that allows him to travel back in time to steal weapons, so naturally the heroes elect to infiltrate Crom’s fortress to use this time portal and get the spare part.
The heroes find the fortress at the bottom of a stone quarry and after a brief tussle with a simian roof guard gain easy access to the lair. They find the moon dial chamber conveniently deserted and Ariel uses her magic to fire up the time machine. They are about to ride their steeds into the past when Crom shows up and fires some magic at them, but it doesn’t stop the heroes from entering the portal and ending up in a busy intersection of a non-apocalyptic city of the ancient past, presumably 1980. A traffic cop gives the time travelers a hard time as motorists gawk in amazement at them, but things get even crazier when Crom comes through the portal and uses magic to turn a city bus into a giant, Thundarr-eating monster at the pulse-pounding commercial break.
Crom foolishly teleports away leaving Thundarr to escape the jaws of the bus beast, and the heroes rally to save hapless pedestrians, including a blonde teenage girl, from the mecha monster. Ookla has shenanigans with a working fire hydrant to remind us that Moks hate water and Thundarr guts the bus beast by jumping on it from a rooftop and riding down its length with his sun sword. The teenage girl, Samantha, takes the time travelers back to her suburban home for milk and cookies and helps them find a spare circuit by locating a computer factory — which really blows Thundarr’s mind — in the phone book. Ookla enjoys a children’s television program hosted by a dubious character named Koo Koo the Clown, Thundarr struggles with the front door lock, and the heroes and Samantha set off on horseback to the Guardian computer factory. They gain access to the abandoned factory and after Thundarr and Ookla are perplexed by an escalator they find the same Guardian computer that will be defending the Alamo in 2000 years, which causes Thundarr to struggle with the concept of time paradoxes. Ariel locates the circuit they need which triggers an alarm and draws the attention of security guards, but Ookla scares them off by threatening to crush them with the Guardian computer. The heroes rush back to the time portal, drop Samantha off with the harried crossing guard despite her appeals to go with them, and travel through time back to their beloved post apocalyptic hellscape.
They find Crom’s fortress deserted as he is no doubt off attacking the undefended Alamo, and Thundarr destroys the moon dial so Crom can no longer steal weapons from the past. The heroes race to the Alamo to find that the cowardly cowboys have already surrendered to Crom and his soldiers, but Thundarr tackles Crom and Ariel puts the new circuit into the Guardian computer, reactivating it. Thundarr makes the pinned down Crom watch as his forces are defeated easily by the drones, and Ariel sends Crom away with her magic. With peace restored Thundarr is anxious to be on their way, but Ariel suggests they rest — after all, she says, they just won the battle of the Alamo.
Who doesn’t love a rollicking, fish out of water time travel adventure? And who doesn’t remember the Alamo? An enjoyably comedic entry that delivers laffs along with the thrills. 5 stars.
Ariel fires up the time machine!
Thundarr runs afoul of Crom’s bus beast!
Ookla discovers the ancient pleasures of cookies and milk.